Hello, my name is Carolyn, and I have been coming to Shore ever since I was born. I had gone to Sunday school and learnt about who Jesus is and believed in the Bible stories enough to call myself Christian. However, I never really knew what that meant and in no way did my daily life reflect that.
For the majority of my life, I came to Sunday service and sang worship despite knowing that I had gone my entire week without thinking of God and then sat and warmed the seats without engaging with the sermon. I would only pray when I felt like it, which turned out to be not very often and I never read the Bible for myself. As I got older, there would be times when I tried to turn towards God, but it would always result in a prolonged period where I distanced myself again. I knew the fact that I was serving two masters, but still, I was unwilling to give up my idols and put him first as I was just so comfortable in my lukewarmness. I know that my sins and constant rejection of Him meant that I deserved to be cut off forever, but through God’s grace, he continued to knock on my heart.
This year, when I had gotten into medical school, I was happy but also felt very lost as to my purpose in life. I had always put academics first but now that I had gotten in, I realised that these achievements would never fulfill me. From then, I was convicted to connect with other Christians and start to seek God properly. I prayed for God to help me do this, and through a series of events, I found myself surrounded by people who, through the Holy Spirit in them, encouraged me in my walk with God. After I properly accepted Jesus into my life, I no longer rely on my own strength to deal with challenges, and my anxieties about the future have disappeared.
I am so thankful for God’s grace toward me, giving me a faithful mum who continued to bring me and my sister to church and a good group of like-minded believers at school. He has worked in my life in more ways than I could realise, even when I rejected Him time and time again. Now, rather than doubting the power of the cross, I can confidently say that Jesus is the way, the truth and the life, and it is only through him that I can be free from the shackles of sin. I want to get baptised to proclaim this truth and write it on my heart. There’s no turning back. I only want to continue to grow my faith and walk with Christ. He is my light, my banner and my purpose. I might be starting out on this path a little late, but I cannot wait to grow closer to and just praise and follow Jesus forevermore.
